All these Marvel movies are pretty fuckin' awesome, some better than others, and this one is great, which was good for me because I expected it to be a piece of shit. I really did, and now I don't know what I was worried about. But I will be worried again when it comes time for The Incredible Hulk sequel. Anyhow, with The Avengers currently shooting and in full swing, this isn't just a movie that tides us over until it gets here and has it's own story to tell, complete with Iron Man's dad.
So we start with Steve Rogers, a pipsqueak of a human, trying to join the army and predictably but most importantly, laughably, fails at every turn. Even with his best friend Bucky Barnes pretty much telling him he's shit, Steve continues to act like a man bigger than he is. Seriously, to say he even acts twice the size he is would be like saying the left tit is bigger than the right tit. Sure, it may be slight, but the point is there's not much difference. He has Terry-tough-cunt syndrome.
Righto bud.
Now onto the actual movie. It stars Chris Evans as Cap, Tommy Lee Jones as Col. Chester Phillips, Hugo Weaving as Red Skull, Hayley Atwell as Peggy Carter, Sebastian Stan as Bucky Barnes, Dominic Cooper as Howard Stark, Derek Luke as Gabe Jones, Neal McDonough as Dum Dum Dugan and Stanley Tucci as Dr. Abraham Erskine.
It begins in the Arctic where someone has found something that has something to do with someone. Captain America is in there frozen. Meanwhile, back in World War II, circa 1942, Red Skull is being a bastard of massive proportions and has found what I assumed was the Cosmic Cube. Turns out I was right and Agent Smith is using it to make some badass weapons.
He looks like a nice chap.
Enter some stubborn pipsqueak named Steve Rogers. While he's about as intimidating as fairy floss, or cotton candy, whatever you want to call it, after lying his way into the army with some help, he volunteers for an experiment to make him into a super soldier. Now that he has Peggy's attention with his massive fucking muscles, he saves scores of allied soldiers and earns the wrath of the guy with the red head.
Throw in Hydra and some Howling Commando's and as you can guess, Cappy fucks shit up, all in a glorious montage, not unlike Rocky 4. We find out why he's stuck in the ice at the start and end with Nick Fury showing up to tell Steve he's been frozen for 70 years. You know, all that believable shit.
There aren't enough girls with guns.
Like the other films in MCU, it has a post credits scene which in this case, is a trailer for The Avengers. It looks pretty insane and has Iron Man, Thor, Captain America, The Hulk, Black Widow, Hawkeye and Nick Fury on screen. So it looks like we will have to fuck-yeah superhero movies to enjoy next year: The Avengers and The Dark Knight Rises.
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